7 March

7 March is yet another memorable day of my life. 

It was on this day in 2003 that we shifted to a house of our own at Mira Road. So today we complete 20 years of living at Mira Road. 

Last year, today is the day that I first witnessed my Carmel Peace. Though I didn't realize and couldn't recognize it immediately, it made me feel that I had witnessed and known it before. Though I kept wondering about this feeling and wondered more and more throughout the week, I still could not fully decipher it. It was so puzzlingly familiar. But instinctively I  knew that I had seen and known this Peace even though I was seeing it for the first time in my life. There was something so familiar about it.

That's why I would like to write about what I was going through when I met hubby to be on 4 March 1999. As I wrote in my post, I wasn't at all interested in him on that day. I was at the lowest point in my life as I was still reeling under the pain of the one-sided heartbreak in November 1998 and joblessness since January 1999. I was broke - mentally and financially - and so did not want to invite any more unnecessary hassles into my life. So I tried to maintain a distance. 

I managed to do so till mid-June of that year. Then I got a decent job in an upcoming dotcom wherein I had to provide content on movies and music. I took up the job gladly because I needed it and as my life had always been influenced by movies and music. 

Then one day I contacted my hubby-to-be for content. He said he was ready to share the content but as he had a lot to share, I had to meet him. So I agreed to meet him. And as they say, the rest is history - we met, he proposed and I could not say no - I suppose because I was tired of life - tired of running my life single-handedly - without any hopes of meeting my South Indian Prince Charming anywhere - tired of my insecurities - and extremely scared of my future! 

And so I decided to move on in my life without the love of the one I loved the most - that unknown unseen Prince Charming who was taking an eternity to make himself known and seen to me. 

Thus it was on 19 June 1999 that I decided to move on without him - I kept moving on with my shattered dreams and kept making blunders for the next 23 years.......I hoped and thought that I had forgotten all about him.......

So to digress from this topic, it is my blog's birthday 🎉 today. I have not called it by any particular name but sometimes I have addressed it as Motu - so happy birthday Motu II. I made you on 7 March 2010 and started blogging the next day - so you are 13 years old today - you have entered your teens!🤭 We had newly shifted to Durgapur when I turned 13 - what a torturous 13 it was with those feelings of ugliness even though I managed to purchase a denim skirt and red top wear and red heels - but I still could not shake off the feeling of looking a weird 13-year-old.🙃