Calm and Composed

Dear DLL Jesus,

The more I think about it the more I realize that Carmel Peace has changed me. I read the blog post that I wrote in 2020 on the same verses. I realized that my feelings have changed - something I wrote toward the end of the post doesn't resonate anymore - I don't like what I wrote then! But I did not delete it intentionally because I want to keep comparing my feelings post and pre-Carmel Peace days and months and years. I know that I have changed and the old posts will help me to determine this change.

Having said that I am glad to have changed and been able to come out of the situations that dominated my heart then - I have realized that Carmel Peace has set me free from my past debacles and filled me with a peace that only Carmel Peace (CP) could do it. So I have decided to go along with this beautiful change and sober down - just the way I was earlier - no more screaming and shouting but just want to be calm and composed - just like the not-so-good old days. Even though I was struggling with life, I did not scream and shout - I was well-mannered and well-behaved, a girl of few words, and not the garrulous woman that I have become - I want to change for my CP's sake because I sense something beautiful in the future and I want to be like those days when I was good even though my life was not.