Everything seems hazy!

Dear DLL Jesus, 

I want to write something. 

But I don't know what to write. 

My mind isn't working as nothing seems right.

The feeling that I am going through is driving me crazy. There are tears welling in my eyes, everything seems hazy.

Now, what did I do to receive such treatment?

Oh, in what way did I make a wrong statement?

The heart is unable to understand,

That I am never to enter my Promised Land.

Lord, please help me to overlook this bypass.

Soothe my heart with your loving stars.

Jesus, I love you!❤️

Dear DLL Jesus,

Today is the Feast of the Sacred Heart ❤️ of Jesus!

During the meditation, it was revealed to me that what is in my heart ❤️ should remain in my heart ❤️. So I take this as my divine revelation today!

Soon after my morning prayers, I happened to see a glimpse of the Carmel Kiran Eucharistic celebration transmitted on YouTube. I heard that part of the homily wherein we were asked to make a sign of the heart ❤️ and say Jesus, "I love you" - throughout the day - because Fr. Rudolph had seen a young couple and a father-daughter duo doing that to each other. Thus he asked everyone to do that to Jesus throughout the day today! Isn't it a swell thing to do?

Well Jesus I say "I love you" to you every day but today I say a special "I love you" to you by making a heart ❤️  with my fingers! 

PS: Today I complete one month of waking up early to meditate and pray!

We have decided to take Goldie's admission to Renaissance college, Indore! Hopefully, we are taking the right decision.

Days of Innocence

Lord, please give me back my days of innocence, 

When I read Nancy Drew and Charles Dickens!

When I grew jasmines and roses,

And played with puppies and kittens! 

Lord, please give me back my days of adolescence,

When I watched tennis and cricket!

How my heart leapt at every wicket!

When I perched on the window sill

watching every raindrop at my will.

Lord, please give me back my integrity 

When I did all things with honesty!

Lord, I am exhausted of this trajectory

As I find a diminished sincerity!

Lord, as I march on in life,

I fail to realise why this plight?

Lord, please give me back my purity,

To maintain my sanctity and sanity!

22 June 2022

As I glimpsed you amidst the multitude,

My heart leapt with joy and happiness!

But did I fail to observe on your countenance,

The same joy and happiness!

Why were your eyes not glinting

And your lips not gleaming 

The way they used to on my beholding?

What thoughts bother you?

What are your troubles?

The Lord says "my presence is enough"

For all your struggles.

Lord, what did you look like?

Dear DLL Jesus, 

Today in the morning while listening to the Hindi hymns, I was wondering what you must have looked like?❤️ 

What we see today is the imagination of various artists and writers - the description handed down by your apostles - has been drawn and written by the artists and writers! Is it anywhere close to what you looked like?

Lord, what did you look like? I want to know. 

Did you have a wheatish complexion? Did you comb your hair sideways? Were you clean-shaven? Did you whistle? Did you like animals? What did you do when you didn't preach and pray and did miracles? I want to know everything. Can you please take me back to your time, just for one day, to be with you and see for myself all your daily activities? Can you please grant me just one day to walk back with you?

See what I wrote yesterday:

Your existence is my greatest happiness,

Nothing can dissuade this sensibility!

My heart rejoices at this certainty,

That no one can take you away at any possibility!

Hope you like it. 

Italian

Today was the day two years ago during the lockdown that I started learning Italian. 

I had already started learning Spanish on 22 April and I wanted to learn another language. So I took to learning Italian. 

I wanted to read and understand the writings of Italian Carmelite saints and also go on a gondola ride in Venice. 

Our Father

Dear DLL Jesus, 

Till now I have not received any divine revelation from you!

But there's one thing that I want to share with you - it's the prayer of Our Father which is in today's gospel. I have been wanting to write about it for quite some time now. Today I got the opportunity.

I had known about the prayer Our Father even before you invited me into your family. It was our school prayer in St. Michael's school, Durgapur. It was printed in the school calendar and we had to say it daily, most probably during the break though I could be wrong. But we did say it daily. 

So when I started attending Mass in 1999 Our Father was the only prayer I could connect to and also knew it almost by heart. Though there were some variations in the words I tried to say it fully, thanks to the daily recitation at St. Michael's school from 1989 to 1993. 

I have been wanting to write this for quite some time now but today I finally wrote it.